‘I Refuse to Be Silent': Writer Says Homosexuality ‘Shattered’ Her Marriage, Family

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‘I Refuse to Be Silent’: Writer Says Homosexuality ‘Shattered’ Her Marriage, Family

By Heather Clark | christiannews.net

Broken-Heart-pd-300x300A mother and writer has generated much discussion following the publication of an article in which she shares her personal story of how homosexuality and same-sex “marriage” shattered her own marriage and family.

“I refuse to be silent,” wrote Janna Darnelle (a pen named used to protect her family’s identity), who states that behind many of the happy photographs in reports on same-sex “marriage,” there are untold stories of sorrow and pain. “I represent one of those real life stories that are kept in the shadows. I have personally felt the pain and devastation wrought by the propaganda that destroys natural families.”

Darnelle recalled that in 2007, her husband announced to her that he believed he was a homosexual, and that he wanted to file for divorce.

“In an instant, the world that I had known and loved—the life we had built together—was shattered,” she said, advising that she urged her husband to stay and fight for their marriage. “But my voice, my desires, my needs—and those of our two young children—no longer mattered to him. We had become disposable, because he had embraced one tiny word (gay) that had become his entire identity.”

She said that when the matter went to court, her husband sought primary custody of the couple’s children, and asserted that he deserved everything that he wanted in the divorce because he was a homosexual. He was granted his request, and later went on to “marry” his male partner with the children present—a photograph that was featured in USA Today.

“Commenters exclaimed at how beautiful this gay family was and congratulated my ex-husband and his new partner on the family that they ‘created,’” Darnelle recalled. “But there is a significant person missing from those pictures: the mother and abandoned wife.  . . .  I am missing. But I am real, and I represent hundreds upon thousands of spouses who have been betrayed and rejected.”

She later expressed concern about the life that he children are now exposed to and how it might affect their psyche as they try to understand their own manhood and womanhood. Her husband and children live in a condo with sixteen other homosexual men.

“One of the men has a 19-year-old male prostitute who comes to service him. Another man, who functions as the father figure of this community, is in his late sixties and has a boyfriend in his twenties,” Darnelle outlined. “My children are brought to gay parties where they are the only children and where only alcoholic beverages are served. They are taken to transgender baseball games, gay rights fundraisers, and LGBT film festivals.”

[My daughter] needs a dad who will encourage her to embrace her femininity and beauty, but these qualities are parodied and distorted in her father’s world.
Her dad wears make-up and sex bondage straps for Halloween. She is often exposed to men dressing as women,” she continued. “Her father should be protecting her sexuality. Instead, he is warping it.”

Darnelle explained that she understands that when a spouse announces that he or she is struggling with same-sex attractions, it may be difficult for them to resist temptation—but they must, just as a man who lusts for woman who is not his wife—do what is right for the sake of their own wedding vows.

“It is common for spouses to be attracted to other people—usually of the opposite sex, but sometimes of the same sex. Spouses who value their marriage do not act on those impulses,” she said. “A good marriage doesn’t only depend on sexual desire, which can come and go and is often out of our control. It depends on choosing to love, honor, and be faithful to one person, forsaking all others.”

Darnelle then urged readers to understand her side of the story, and why she feels that she must speak out for the others whose marriages and families have been torn part.

“My children and I have suffered great losses because of my former husband’s decision to identify as a gay man and throw away his life with us,” she said. “This type of devastation should never happen to another spouse or child. Please, I plead with you: defend marriage as being between one man and one woman. We must stand for marriage—and for the precious lives that marriage creates.”

Rivka Edelman reports that Darnelle has been the subject of much hostility and harassment following the publication of her now viral article, and that once one reader learned of her identity, he contacted her employer in an attempt to have her fired.

37 Comments on “‘I Refuse to Be Silent': Writer Says Homosexuality ‘Shattered’ Her Marriage, Family”

  1. Derrick

    Praise God for this brave women who had the courage to speak out against this abomination. This kind of betrayal of women by downlow brotha’s is devistating to the entire family. My home state of Virginia was very recently struck with a blow from the Supreme court who overturned a bann on same sex marriage. God help us!

  2. HB

    VERY DISHEARTENING! Reading all this woman is going through is horrifying and I pray for healing and peace for her and protection for those children. Their father had selfishly put them at risk mentally and physically! They are not safe in that wicked environment!

  3. Iris

    Wow I am glad this silenced voice has spoken up. Without knowing/hearing the details of this divorce, etc., it sounds to me like the court focused more on the gay issue/rights of the father NOT being trampled on (maybe for fear of another court overturning the decision???) than what I KNOW to be the real issue – the rights and best interest of the child(ren). I pray for those and all children who are being raised up in a way they should NOT go. And I pray this mother continue to find refuge and a hidingplace for her soul. Even this burden, God will handle. Be encouraged :-)

    The days that Jesus spoke of in Matt. 24 and 25 are not long off. Let us be vigilant, sober, observant and most of all, Patient. He will show up at the, HIS, appointed time and not one second sooner.

  4. Darla

    My Lord! What a devastating story! I pray God restores this woman and her children. People don’t realize what a despicable and perverted lifestyle homosexuality really is! This is what Obama has ushered in!

  5. creesha

    I live in NC where we too were struck with the news of acceptance of same sex marriage. Though my heart is grieved, I knew this was coming. It’s important that the true ppl of God stand against sin, live a life that pleases him, as we wait on his return!! He is soon to come!

  6. Chandra

    This is such a sad and devastating story. If it wasn’t for the many but still few God fearing, God obeying and God loving people on earth I would prefer God to just wipe out this evil planet like Sodom & Gomarrah. There are a few states I’ve read like Indiana that are trying to ban same sex marriage but are being overturned by the courts. People are fighting but it’s not helping. God help us!

  7. Tonya Williams

    My heart goes out to you. I am married and have been for 20 years and have disrespected by down low men at times. I will help you fight back if you need it….I stand behind you 100%

  8. Eileen

    What a travesty!it is terrible that the head of the Catholic Church has condoned homosexuality saying” it is not for him to judge.” Many Catholics are very happy because they do not know the word of God. ( I was raised Catholics) We need to pray without ceasing! May God have mercy on this nation!

  9. Trina Pittman

    This is upsetting to me, how this immature male individual thinks of only himself in only fulfilling his perverted urges. I think it was wrong of him to have married and not honor his vows he made to the father God. Given the right to divorce and earned favor in court for custody. Nobody objects or questions his motives.

    The man then goes to neglect his children in the most horrifying way and is not called on it at all, because the court gave him custody of the children. The same Judge needs to remove the children from his custody, because of child endangerment. He is so far from raising those kids In a normal life. It sounds like he has turned his children into a satanic project.

    So my prayer today is:
    Lord God, loose those children away from that
    satanic representative seeking to destroy their lives.
    Expose him and shine the light on his wreckless lifestyle.
    Prepare the mother for the return of their children and may
    they all have spiritual counseling visitation from the Holy Spirit for healing. In Jesus Name Amen!

  10. Vanessa

    We, as the Body of Christ need to stop being complacent, hiding in our comfortable houses where our faith isn’t being ‘challenged,’ requiring us to actually ‘grow-up’ in the things of the Spirit of God by DEFENDING the God whom we claim to serve. His character, His holiness is being bashed through our laziness and fear. We have a commission, as Christians, to represent Him! There is a real enemy out there, called the devil, who is out to ‘steal, kill, and destroy.'(John 10:10.) And he operates through ACTIONS called SIN in the Bible by our God. ‘For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.'(Eph. 6:12.) Gay people are not our enemy. The devil is. But the blatant truth is that gays are allowing the devil to operate through them, thus giving the devil exactly what he wants: to steal, kill, and destroy. They don’t realize that he’s also destroying them at the same time he’s destroying the rest of the ‘abandoned, rejected’ family. Doesn’t the LOVE and kindness of God lead a man to repentance? (Rom. 2:4.) ‘But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.’ (Luke 6:35.)
    Let’s ‘WAKE UP, SLEEPING GIANT’ and start really learning how to fight against our enemies, and not people! ‘From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven has suffered violence, and the violent take it by force.’ (Mt. 11:12.) God calls us to holiness. He says: ‘Be holy, for I am holy’ (Lev. 11:44.) We cannot compromise our tenet of faith. We WILL speak boldly against evil, in all of the forms laid out in scripture, which includes homosexuality. And we WILL love the people performing it, by showing them kindness, graciousness, forgiveness especially when they don’t deserve it. And, we WILL vehemently, unapologetically, viciously fight against the evil spirits causing the chaos. They’ve made their eternal choice – they will eternally burn in the fires of Hell. But the people they are operating through still have a chance to be saved, as long as they live and breathe. Lies never saved anyone. Truth does. May God richly bless this woman for her courage in speaking out. And lets PLEASE uplift her, her children and others like them in prayer, intense intercession. Let’s protect them in the spirit realm so they may have a fighting chance at life, at salvation.

  11. Moses D Jr

    Praying for her and the children her ex husband needs to wake up, and see that he needs help. Poor babes I can’t help knowing it’s sad seeing the kids seeing abomination as ok and good which is disgusting not from God.

  12. Joel howard

    Wow.powerful story.I hope God either restores this woman’s marriage with a brand new husband who is saved and filled with the holy ghost. Being gay is sin,evil,wicked and nasty.Jesus have Mercy! Avenge innocent blood!

  13. shi

    I am thankful for this woman in publishing this story. She found God – and thankfully that she did, because only Jesus can reveal the hidden truths of the homosexual lifestyle and allow others to see it for what it really, truly does and is: to kill, steal and destroy. Sound familiar?

    She prayed and God opened her eyes to see how devastating, grossly filthy, morally corrupt and absent, and banter (cut throat) this lifestyle is; but only when it came home – when it came to her front doors. Pray God that he will keep us from evil and give us the discernment, in Jesus’ name to resist evil, steer clear from it, and recognize it – before that person marries you, or comes to your doors!

    Prevention is better than a curse.

  14. apostle free

    I commend you for sharing that with the people,I have so much to say, but I pray for CHRIST JESUS! Return, come quickly LORD JESUS! Come quickly

  15. Yengwayo

    Gayism is ancient, it’s not something new, that’s why God destroyed Sodom and Gommorah. This woman should go down on her knees and lament for her children that they may be returned to her. It’s terrible that her children should grow in such environment, moreover where is the social services to protect these poor souls who daily witness drunkards, sex and orgies this is rubbish. She should fight for her kids, whatever it takes even it costs her, her life.

  16. Susan Cottrell

    Why would you want to defend God? Is God a 12-year-old being bullied in the public square that we need to protect? Or is God well able to handle ALL that is going on, however God (not we) see fit. You are all right that there is SO much carnage from people who come out in their marriages as LGBTQ. Dare I say this, but if LGBTQ people were allowed to express who they are without fear of rejection and worse, then men like “Janna’s” husband would never had married her and she would have married a man who would stay with her her entire life? Sounds like a much better solution than these kinds of stories which abound.

  17. melissa

    We are truly living in the last day’s! This a sad story, but is becoming a reality in this nation! This is like shaking a fist in God’s face, and acting like his word don’t matter! People need to wake up and fall on their knees in repentance. God is a God of love and long suffering, but He will not continue to hold back His Wrath on this nation! If He judged His own chosen people what makes our government think He won’t judge us. I pray that people will begin to open up their eyes and see what is really going on. We are fast approaching the day when the Antichrist will rule and reign in the earth! Time is short and we got to be ready! May God move on behalf of this lady and those Innocent children! I pray they will be home soon! Much blood will be on a lot of people hands. Many God have mercy on us!

  18. Dee Dee

    SO INCREDIBLY TRAGIC. My heart breaks for this woman and her children. The loss is devastating: first her husband, then her children!? No chance to grieve before being assailed with a crippling fear for the welfare of her precious children! My God,…how much longer? I pray for her sanity and for her strength. I pray for her children, that the Lord provide a hedge of protection from sexual sin and generational curses until they are delivered from that demon-infested sty. Have mercy on us Lord!

  19. Shirin

    These people need to be delivered from that demonic spirit, homosexuality is a demon spirit and must be cast out by the Mighty name of Jesus, these are the end times and very perilous times the word of God tells us in – II Timothy 23:1-5King James Version (KJV)
    3 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,4 Traitors, heady, high minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

    Satan has blinded the minds of these people II Corinthians 4:4 – 4Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don’t believe. They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News. They don’t understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God.

    We command total destruction of every gay marriage, Fire of the Holy Ghost to burn every gay marriage erected and cancel all future gay marriages in the Mighty name of Jesus, Fire of the Holy Ghost, Fire of the Holy Ghost in the Mighty Name of Jesus… We command every demonic force tormenting our Sister and her children to cease now in the mighty name of Jesus, Jesus, Jesus – We uproot every seed the enemy has sown into her children to be destroyed now by the Fire of the Holy Ghost – We command every chain to break, break, break now in the Mighty name of Our Lord and Savior JESUS, WE COVER HER AND HER CHILDREN UNDER THE PRECIOUS BLOOD OF JESUS , NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST THEM SHALL PROSPER IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME – FATHER WE THANK YOU FOR HEALING, RESORATION AND BREAKTHROUGH IN HER LIFE AND THAT YOU HAVE HEARD US, WE BELIEVE AND RECEIVE IT IN JESUS ALL POWERFUL NAME, AMEN!!!!

  20. alethia

    We as childhood of God are neglected fasting which is a very important arsenal to prayer. we no longer fast about governmental proposals, or issues before the supreme court. Pastors no longer call the congregation into fasting and prayer about their community or about the first community which is the family. Congregations are compelled to fast and pray about legislations and legislators. We are only focused on our own four walls places of worship. So while we have been preoccupied and I dare say obsessed with trying to be popular, prosperous and building mega churches and compromising the enemy has crept in and pulled the rug from under our feet. It is because of our complacency as a previous commenter mentioned. we have helped this prophesy to be fulfilled because of our spiritual negligence. Blind pastors, who have become their own gods, wanting to be celebrities and compromising.

  21. Jack

    Notice that this person mentioned nothing about faith , I can’t judge her heart only GOD can. My point is, if she is without the faith, even she knows that this type of behavior is wrong. Even a child ( without any knowledge of GOD) knows this. As does those that live this so-called life. It’s their own lust that drives them, with a lot of help
    from that spirit, and their past hurts that were not healed. We can still harvest these, we just got to get out there in the fields. Harvesting is not and easy job, but someone has to do it and if we have accepted CHRIST it’s our job.
    May GOD Bless this woman and her children. It took a lot of guts to write that article. Their power in this world is strong as evident by the harassment she is getting. Let’s pray that she gets her children back. HE can do this !

  22. Florence

    It took a lot for her to come out and speak the truth. Hopefully more will speak so that the truth be told. It’s so unfair and selfish to start a family with someone who trusts you and then leave them for your sexual desires. I feel the same about adultery in general.

    This reminds me a lot about a movie called “Cover.” They are married men that are on the DL and pass HIV to their male/ female partners basically. Many of the men hide behind the vow of marriage but still desire men. The women know but have grown accustom to the extravagant lifestyle. Well all except one.

    I believe that God gives us warnings before we get married. But maybe he was the one but decided to hear the devils voice and stepped out of deliverance. Sometimes we can be delivered from something but walk out of it. Like GOD can heal someone but if they start back doing the same habits as before, then they will need rescuing again. GOD help us all.

  23. blake

    Man I’ll tell you I’m not a person who crys easily but this story has brought tears to my eyes. This man is a disgusting vile man who shouldn’t be able to see the outside world. How dare he take this woman’s heart and destroy it for his unnatural desires and change the lives of those children forever. I pray that God blesses the woman and her children. And whoever the idiots who harass her and try to get her job taken from her, they need to be eternally thrown in a dark hole for their disregard towards an innocent woman. Im disgusted!

  24. Ivan

    (sigh) i truly believe if he were real within himself from the beginning, he could’ve prevented this young lady from being hurt. Alot of guys and girls get married to either cover up their same sex attractions or desires or they may think that by getting married, the struggle will cease. Jesus is the only answer to this issue and continual fasting and praying even AFTER salvation. My perspective? Make sure you’ve fasted and prayed and sought after the heart of God before entering in holy matrimony (which is and will always be between ONE man and ONE woman til DEATH do you part), especially if you had dealings with homosexuality or were curious. While i do NOT support same sex marriage, i dont think its the cause of her failed marriage, at least not 100% simply because there have been men and women on the DL for years (even before same sex marriage was on the table).

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